Light Break Through These Walls
The other day I was listening to Hillsong United Pandora station while doing laundry. Phil Wickam’s True Love started playing and it reminded me of something that happened around 13 years ago. I was in college and ,I didn’t know it then, was severely depressed and suffered from social anxiety. I didn’t have many friends because life events mixed with depression and social anxiety had caused me to build up a wall. I lived under a constant state of fear. I remember really praying and crying out to God to help me break down these walls. I would sometimes draw as a way to pray to God. One day, I drew myself within a box with the word fear inside and friends written on the outside. I also wrote “light break through these walls.” Later that same day, my husband had one of his friends come over. He was excited about a new music video that he just discovered and wanted to show is to us. The music video was for Phil Wickam’s song True Love. Here is the link, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCuTLVmxMuM. At the 3:20ish minute mark light is literally breaking through the wall that the people in the music video had built up. I never want to forget how overwhelmingly loved I felt in that moment. I felt so seen and understood by God. The creator of this universe had heard my prayer? Honestly, what are the chances of something like that happening? Years later, through some therapy and lots of tears, I have less walls. I allow myself to build relationships now. Even though I’m probably still a little bit socially awkward, I’m ok with it. Don’t get me wrong, there are still moments where I question “Should I have said that? Do they still like me? Did I say/do something wrong?” Those moments, however aren’t as crippling as they used to be. So as I remind myself of God's love for me and the peace available to me through Jesus, I encourage you to "Come close, listen to the story. About a love more faithful than the morning.
(Lamentations 3:22-23)
The father gave his only son Just to save us
(John 3:16)
When blood and water
hit the ground
(John 19:34)
Walls we couldn't move
came crashing down
(Hebrews 9:22) Then we were free and made alive The day that true love died
(Ephesians 2:5) Lose your life, Just so you can find it
(Matthew 16:25) Jesus is alive He rose again"
(Matthew 28:6)
This has been heavy on my heart to share for a few days now. I made this for myself. It’s simple ,but when you really think about it and meditate on what these 6 different words mean - they can be literally life changing. I know the fall isn't typically the time to celebrate Jesus's resurrection ,
but there's never a wrong time to celebrate it. If you want a copy of this as a reminder of God's love for you let me know and I'll gladly send you the PDF file. Just contact us through FB messenger, comment below and we'll reach out to you, or send us an email.
